Long gone are the days when a woman had to settle for a ho-hum life with transitioning into Menopause.
For far too long, women have been expected to hang up their boots with the end of their monthly cycles. With increasing research into women’s health and healthful aging, we now know this no longer needs to be the case.
So we took it upon ourselves to bust some of the most common myths around menopause. Most women have heard these from their mothers, friends, magazines, and even medical providers.
Myth 1 – Your sex drive will tank
While this may be true for same women, and during the initial period of hormonal adjustment, the large majority find that the newfound freedom that menopause brings can be quite liberating. Women often find themselves with fewer day-to-day responsibilities around their work, homes & children. This increased flexibility gives on the chance to better take care of one’s physical & emotional needs. Women find themselves being more active, starting new hobbies or going back to old ones, and finding time for things that bring them joy.
A happy side-effect of the decreased stress in other areas of one’s life, is the increased energy and enthusiasm in the bedroom. Being freed from the stresses of caring for children and regular work schedules, women often find themselves with more time and energy to play an active part between the sheets. While having a partner to be intimate with is wonderful, and can rekindle the romance in longstanding relationships, menopause is a great opportunity to learn self-love. Some women turn to self-pleasure for the first-time in their lives and enjoy all the benefits it brings.
Of note is that surgical menopause, which sets in after removal of the uterus and/or ovaries, results in a significant decrease of androgens – Androstenedione, Dehydroepiandrosterone (DHEA), DHEA sulfate (DHEA-S), Dihydrotestosterone (DHT). These decreased levels often come with a negative impact on women’s desire and sexual responsiveness. Working with your physician to find the right combination of HRT (hormonal replacement therapy), which often takes a trial & error process, is beneficial for most women. Adding regular exercise, and a phytoestrogen-rich diet is also known to be beneficial as well.
Myth 2 – Your vagina becomes “loose”
Menopause comes with a wave of hormonal changes, with the dip is estrogen levels being one that most affects pelvic health. Estrogen is responsible for maintaining healthy levels of fatty tissue inside the pelvis. This fatty tissue acts as a “filler” or padding material for the structures inside your pelvis, including the vagina. During sexual intercourse, this fatty tissue provides the cushioning needed for the vagina to naturally elongate and widen to accommodate insertion. Think of how the vagina feels “full” with a tampon in, but is able to easily accommodate a penis or sex toy at other times.
With the dip is estrogen during menopause, a lot of this padding is lost, resulting in a feeling of “extra space” or “roominess” in your pelvis during intimacy or even intermittently during the day. If this happens, remember that it is a completely normal change – your vagina has not become “loose”, rather the padding around it has decreased.
To remedy this, work with your physician or a nutritionist to find medications and food sources of estrogens. Increasing levels of bioavailable estrogen in your body will improve vaginal lubrication, as well as increase the padding or fullness around your vagina. For those concerned about oral estrogen supplementation, your physician will likely recommend estrogen cream that is applied locally on the vulva & vagina, which is shown to have improved localized benefits.
Myth 3 – You will need to stock up on incontinence products
Increased urinary leaking is a common symptom with aging (in women and men!) but it doesn’t have to be your daily reality! With the decreased padding and support to your pelvic structures, urinary incontinence becomes common with menopausal changes. The bladder neck and urethra lose some of the “closing- off” support due to decreased fatty deposits in the pelvis. As a result, leaking is common with sneezing, laughing, coughing, or exercise.
Increasing bioavailable estrogen through diet or medication can help. Also very helpful is pelvic floor strengthening. By doing daily exercise of your pelvic muscles – about 10 times once or twice a day, you can give more support to your pelvic structures and decrease leakage.
Our pelvic floor therapist assists women in Tampa Bay and beyond to regain control of their bladders through telehealth and in-office visits. Click here to learn more!
You can start strengthening your pelvic floor today by doing daily kegels and reverse kegels using the instructions in the video below. If your symptoms persist, don’t give up hope – instead find a pelvic floor therapist near you by using the online registry at www.pelvicrehab.com. You can also work with our Pelvic Floor Specialist to start feeling your best today!
Myth 4 – Orgasms are only for young people
Whatever your belief system may be, sexuality is an important part of the human experience, and age is no excuse to limit the quality of our sexual experiences. Certain medical conditions, such as heart disease, diabetes, chronic pain, and neurological conditions, may interfere with the ability to participate in sexual activity. However, working with an occupational therapist who can help you identify adaptive tools or alternate sexual positions & strategies to continue being sexually intimate can be very helpful.
Experimenting with self-pleasure, sex toys, and various sexual positions can help in continuing to enjoy orgasms. Be sure to use good water or silicone based lubricant to maintain adequate moisture in your vagina during intimacy.
The pleasureABLE Manual by the University of British Columbia can be a great starting point for couples looking to stay sexually engaged throughout their lifespan. Please note that this Guide is explicit, and includes terminology and images that may be uncomfortable for some individuals.
Download the Manual here: PleasureABLE Sexual Device Manual
Myth 5 – Surgery or medication is the only way to reclaim your vaginal health in menopause.
While surgery and medication can be very helpful and necessary for managing certain pelvic health complaints during menopause, there’s a lot one can do through diet, exercise, pelvic floor exercise, and sex counseling. Studies show that a significant portion of women don’t see positive benefits to their sex drives, arousal & orgasm quality with hormone replacement medication alone. Working with a sexuality expert to find ways to improve these areas can be very fulfilling. Our Pelvic Floor Therapist is dually-trained as a sex counselor, and has assisted numerous individuals & couples find increased pleasure in intimacy.
Adding phytoestrogens, daily mindfulness activities, and pelvic floor exercise are beneficial low-risk methods to boost your vaginal and sexual health.
Use all of these ideas and resources as a starting point to start feeling more confident in this new stage of your femininity. Menopause doesn’t have to be the end of your youthful self, but can be doorway to many new possibilities.
Our pelvic floor specialist consults with women and couples of all ages to help them feel comfortable and confident in their bodies & relationships. You can contact us here to set up a consultation, or follow us on social media for more resources to live a plentiful life!
References
New attitudes to sexuality in menopause– https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/13697130701599876
Pharmacologic variation between different estrogen products – https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/8530713/
Sexual function, menopause and hormone replacement therapy (HRT) – https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0378512203003876
PleasureABLE Sexual Manual – https://icord.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/09/PleasureABLE-Sexual-Device-Manual-for-PWD.pdf
